Funny diet tips

• Stand next to a person fatter than you whenever possible and never ever befriend a real skinny!!!

• To make your hips and thighs look slim on the beach, dig two tunnels under your thighs and make a small dent in the sand for your bottom. Place your towel over the top and sit in the dug out area. Hey presto, no bulging thighs and hips.

• If you have a problem with eating too much in the evenings, go to bed at 7.30 pm every night and ask your partner to hand cuff you to the bed, you never know, you may solve two problems in one, by spicing up your sex life at the same time.

• Con your friends into thinking how good you're looking lately ..... study and memorize your most flattering pose in a mirror and ensure when anyone sees you, you strike the pose..... note, this only works if you then don't move again until they've left the room.

• Always eat in private, if people never see you eat, they'll believe you when you say you have a thyroid problem.

• Whenever a friend calls round, tell them you're on your way to the gym, word will get round about how fit and healthy you are.... and you may feel it necessary to prove it once in a while.

Va doresc mult succes!!!